Director General Quarterly Trends: Trends of Trends

 

Trends of Trends

 

01 Trends

Trends are going to be huge this year. Nothing is going to remedy your imposter syndrome faster than a red hot trend. Arm yourself with some infallible future-gazing and prepare to feel superior.

 

02 VR Food

Let’s face it, your “new year - new you” vibe is already dead. What is it now, your third sugar-fuelled dopamine hit of the day? Well fret not, this year you’ll have all the visual pleasure of your favourite guilt-lard with none of those pesky calories.

 

03 Celeb-Preneurs

With oxygen thieves increasing ten fold over the last 12 months it’s no surprise that the cess-pool of celebrity are literally oozing to throw cash at the next big thing. Sell your soul and you’ll be set.

 

04 Brandlessness

Brands will need to fracture the shackles of identity and clothe themselves in the splendour of anti-identity to cut through. Ditch everything you know about yourself to become an Emperor of industry.

 

05 Internet of Eyes

This year sees the arrival of the internet of eyes and everything’s getting the gift of sight - your car, your front door, hell even your toaster is about to get an overhaul, so watch out.

 

06 Internet of Ears

Are you listening? Because everything else is. Become a  fly on every wall you choose, it’s not creepy - it’s the future.

 

07 Second City Renaissance

Living and working in one location is the new dark ages. Come to the light and split your time with a bit of locus duality. Be like Drake (the good one).

 

08 Anti-Luxury Luxury

Luxury is grotesque. Play the game right and people will flock to the dirtiest favela for a chance to worship at your corrugated altar.

 

09 Transcendent Retail

Retail has been reborn from the BHS-stained ashes of the high street to take its place amongst the gods. It’s not about products or even services anymore - the future is in omnipotent values.

 

10 Purple Sweet Potatoes

There’s nothing more current than a juxtaposed colour palette. Except when it’s partnered with the starch based saviour of the vegan movement. Expect purple sweet potatoes to smash through the avocado ceiling this year.


 

The Director General
Future Trends Futurist

He sleeps in the boot of his S-Class Jag Shirley, he’s a middle-aged trendsetter, and he gets very angry when the world gets ahead of him without him noticing (so he does his best not to take his eyes off it). Once a Colossus of the Creative Industries, now not so much. He’s looking for redemption in the Lady Grey tea leaves of future innovation, and he is so confident he is on to something that he has just got himself a desk (with lockable storage) at WeWork. He’s our very own DG and he is soon to have his own show on Sky Channel 679.

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