End of the world new product Team: ZOMBIE Apocalypse

No one understands how we got here, but the fact is that Zombies are real and are knocking on our office windows as we try to get some real ideation work done. Very distracting. Yeah, sure, it might have been that accidental release in Hull of a new biological weapon which caused it, but either way, the raging argument over the last years of whether Zombies are slow or fast runners has been answered for now - they are neither. They move like a pot bellied middle-aged man in skinny jeans (nursing a sprained ankle from last night’s 5 a side football match) running for a bus.  Anyhow,  we’ve come up with our top 3 new products which we think will really help.

Fischer Price Chain Gun

Make every body not yet consumed by the undead count! Children aged 3-7 will love this colourful chrome-titanium machine gun with easy grip handles and super-smooth turning mechanism, meaning whether they’re taking down a horde of feral ghouls or writing their name on the side of a building they’ll be improving hand-to-eye coordination in the deadliest of ways!

Noise-cancelling Headphones Zombie Edition

Unwinding after a long day of cowering can be tough over the incessant groans of your horrifically infected neighbours. Thankfully these noise-cancelling cans have a 25 hour battery life, meaning you can quietly sob in peace for longer. Buy them before Christmas and receive a free Enya CD.

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Morale-boosting Novelty T-shirts

Keep morale up whilst looking hip in front of your dead mates with these jazzy t-shirts. Made from pima cotton and with capped sleeves, you’ll be sure to be making the headlines in Apocalypse Vogue